Saturday, April 25, 2009

Peep peep

The peeper frogs are here.

Which means Spring has officially Sprung.

Hooray!!

Here's the gen. on the little bundles of joy, from the Nova Scotia Museum of Natural History website.


Who can ignore a deafening chorus of Spring Peepers on a warm spring night? These thumbnail-sized tree frogs leave their woodland hibernation sites as early as March in southwestern Nova Scotia. Perched on grasses and sedges at the edge of ponds or roadside ditches, the males call mates with a shrill "peep peep peep". Their brown or gray colour, always with a dark stripe on the sides of the head and dark markings on the back provide excellent camouflage against the dead spring grasses. If the night is cold, Peepers retreat under leaves and stems. You'll likely hear hundreds before you ever see one.

About 1,000 eggs are laid singly on twigs and leaf litter at the pond bottom. Then adults head back to the woods for the summer, fall and winter. The males may continue to call from trees, clinging a metre or more off the ground with adhesive toe pads. Some call occasionally during the day throughout the summer and fall. The tadpoles develop rapidly and transform from July through September.

This treefrog eats mostly soft-bodied invertebrates. Small spiders, moth larvae and water midges are a common food items.


CAW take their medicine

It appears that the CAW did the deal with Chrysler yesterday.

Tough times. All that fighting in the newspapers last week about how the company was spinning the benefits package wrong turned out to be true. According to the G&M:

The concessions, including cuts to health-care coverage, vacations, bonuses, incentives to buy Chrysler vehicles and other benefits, met the company's target of reducing labour costs by $19 an hour, CAW president Ken Lewenza said last night at a news conference at a Toronto hotel.

The CAW had me (and probably a lot of decent Canadians) convinced that the benefits package was all going towards paying for healthcare for elderly workers who needed heart bypasses. And now I hear they were getting cheap cars.

Cheap effin' cars! They've been holding out on a deal so they can buy cheap effin' cars? Why don't they just sneak the parts out of the factory and build their own cars during their vacations?

Yes, I know that would be wrong. And nobody that works in an Ontario auto-manufacturing facility would ever do that.

Silly Chrysler. If I were them, I'd have spun that part of the story... not the snowbirds healthcare story.

It stands to reason. If you want to divide and conquer, you have to create 'deh scorn' for the other side among the hoi polloi.

The snowbird health issue created 'deh jealousy', which is a useful divide and conquer strategy, but because it was about healthcare, it also created a 'hmmm, maybe I shouldn't dump on this because some day it could be me' factor. Because everyone wants to move somewhere warm with free healthcare when they're old.

Not very useful.

However, as we all know now, nobody wants a deal on a Chrysler. Now that I know they were holding out on that, I HAVE DEH SCORN.

Watching this public relations fight is like watching two drunk people mud-wrestle with their eyes blindfolded.

Dreadful application of the basic principles of a hearts and minds strategy.

Well, thank goodness for the deal I suppose.

The company is saved for another while.

Oh no, that's right, my tax dollars have to be handed over first.

Well, at least they're not going to be used to pay for people I don't know to get cut-price Chryslers.

Or. Fiats. Or Alfa Romeos.

You expect the banks to rip you off and fuck you over. You do.

But not the unions.

I am done with the Third Estate, until the model is changed and everyone can join a union, any union, and there are no more private clubs for 'certain' workers.

Done.



Thursday, April 23, 2009

The Estates are crumbling

Is it just me, or has anyone else noticed that the three of the four Estates, a kind of early social partnership invented by the French, are crumbling.

I am working on the assumption that we accept the concept of the Fourth Estate.

And then there's one still doing quite well.

I bet you can't guess which one!!

I am beginning to realise that my entire world, my intellectual world that is, is framed by French Revolutionary philosophical constructs. And now that we seem to be going back to some kind of strange post-pre-Revolutionary version of society, it has me all a flutter intellectually.

The Estates were of course the clergy, the nobility, and the commons, the Rest of France.

And the Fourth Estate was the press. Or the meeja, as we call it nowadays.

Let's just take a quick scan and see how they're all doing.

The clergy we can pretty much agree on, I think.

They gradually lost relevance and by default power when people started to get educated and realise that hell was a concept rather than an actual destination.

An interesting side bar to this was that through the power of the replacement place of worship - television - people also found out that they weren't the only little boy that was buggered in the sacristy and consequently felt entitled to get very angry about it.

Which sped up the decline.

The Second Estate, otherwise known as the nobility, gradually lost some of their stranglehold on power and capital. There were various reasons for this, some of the more famous ones include: parliamentary democracy, the American Revolution, the Industrial Revolution, the Crimea, in-breeding, the Somme Offensive, Communism.

They were gradually replaced by the common or garden rich. Also known as capitalists, or industrialists. Or self-made men.

Now known as the super-rich.

For the purposes of this post, we shall consider the nobility and their replacements the same.

After a long period of retrenchment driven by WWII, the GI Bill, and the creation of the welfare state, they are ON THE WAY BACK!

Why do I say that?

According to the Marquis de Vauban, a famous 17th century French engineer (and blogger for his time), the French population around 1690 consisted of 10% beggars, 50% near beggars, and 30% badly off.

Which left 10% who had most of the money.

That would be Estates 1 and 2.

And apparently it got worse before the Revolution, as there was a major recession followed by a period of high inflation caused by flagrant spending and a major increase in government debt.

Which generally enables a cash grab by those with the wherewithal to do it, i.e. the super-rich.

Nowadays, according to the UN, the top one percent of the world’s adult population owns 40% of the world’s wealth, while the top 2% owns over half and the top 10% owns 85%.

Which means, ehm, huh, blah di blah.... lookee see... seems that annoying 10% still has the lion's share of what's left of the planet.

And this was three years before the recent kick off of the latest major recession.

Which as we all know is resulting in stimulus packages and quantative easing (i.e. the printing of a lot of greenbacks and loonies), which will presumably result in ..... a period of high inflation blah blah blah....

I wish we could just call it the fucking cash grab it is and move on.

As I said, one of the Estates is still doing okay.

The Third Estate, known as the Rest of France, is the Estate I gave my heart to at an early age.

As we all know, it eventually became the Communes or Commons, which took advantage of the rampant inflation and poverty caused by the recession to seize power in 1789 and chopped enough heads off the other two to get some changes rammed through.

Mankind, well those of us born without a silver spoon in our mouths, entered a period of stability-ish.

In France, parliamentary democracy ensued and spread, along with capitalism, colonialism, the bustle skirt, culture for the masses, some dreadful poetry about nature and a few other things. (I'm synopsising here obviously)

It couldn't last.

Eventually, the poets had to grow up and get a real job. The military-industrial complex grew up on the backs of the workers. Markets were created for a load of inventions through the clever use of inter-locking treaties that impelled Europe into many many wars over some geo-politically important carbon-based energy resources (also known as the Alsatian coal mines).

However, some luck ensued for the hoi polloi. Eventually one of these wars became about FREEDOM. And consequently took so many working people to win, it forced through reasonable equality for our grandparents.

Yesirree bob.

It took a long time, some tyranny, some setbacks, and the subjucation of everyone east of the Danube for seventy years, but eventually the Third Estate prevailed.

Their victory over the Second Estate complete, the Communards all went home, went to school, got big jobs and grew big bellies.

And drove big cars.

That took a lot of gas.

Here in Canada their children are known as the Canadian Auto Workers.

They had it good for a while.

But times change, and the whell turns.

And they are fucked now.

And rightly so.

And not just because they make crap cars.

And this is an irrelevant sidebar, but if I ever go to Ireland again and have to sit in a restaurant and be told that I am a traitor to the working class...

By some bloke with a Donnybrook accent...

I will SCREAM.

The reason I am not up for the CAW right now, even though my heart is very sore on their behalf, is because they forgot where they came from.

The Third Estate was 'the rest of France'.

Which translates into the rest of us.

Not some of the rest of us.

All of the rest of us.

Dudes - don't think you're going to get my support by running a campaign that accuses the rich of dividing the working classes and setting us against each other, when you lot were the ones who drew the line down the middle of us with a big $79 felt tip pen.

And are prepared to lose 10,000 jobs rather than rub out the line.

DON'T.

Not only did you show them the weak spot.

You were so friggin' hubristic you forgot we can all see the line too.

I'm too depressed to go on right now.

Goddamn it and I still have to weep over the decline of the clippable newspaper (and by default truthful journalism).

The complexity of the world is giving me Deh Bloggin' Fear

Apologies for not posting sooner.

Although, as someone whose opinion creates a deep indifference in my soul said today: 'I hate blogs, it's just blah blah blah about me me me and it goes on and on and on. I prefer Twitter.'

So maybe I shouldn't bother.

I was going to point out that there was a device called a back button that you could use to rid yourself of the blah blah blah, but the depth of my indifference was insurmountable.

Me, I hate Twitter. Particularly today. I spent all day today at an Internet marketing conference being told how great Twitter is.

I'm sure it is. Haikus are great, and Twitter is just a Western form of Haiku (Western in that there are no rules, just individuality, which means it's just other people's condensed blah). And it's not that I don't like blah.

It's just that if I'm going to read blah, I like a bit of context.

Hence my love of the blah blah blah di blah blah of other people's thoughts.

Now if we had a Twitter that enforced the rigid forms of a haiku, I would be a fan. Corporations that think they can send messages to our phones and pretend they have a relationship with us would have to actually hire someone with some creativity to write their 'relationship building communications'.

The world of marketing would be populated by Leonard Cohen types who built special relationships with the owners of the phones (sorry, mobile devices) they were messaging.

Now, that would be a marketing-driven relationship I could live with.

Did you know that customer service is the new marketing?

I was surprised to hear that....

Ah no, I wasn't.

I remember the last recession and the marketing lecturer I was forced to listen to for three hours a week at the time (I was doing a business post-grad to outwit the recession) used to say that.

Then the economy swung back up and customer service took a back seat to gouging clients who wanted to gouge customers.

Marketing is truly the work of the devil. I said that in 1993 when I had to study it and I say it again today.

Anyways, the fear is subsiding. Let me eat my supper and see if I can sort out the swirl of thoughts in my brain.

blah blah blah blah blah............. di blah.............

Monday, March 23, 2009

Makes me sick ... see how far we done fell

This blog is about seeing the beauty in small things.

Like this afternoon.

I was home sick. It was snowing. I was trying to read an article on rural broadband and figure out what to do next. I had the tv on in the background. People were banging on about trillions of dollars and toxic debts and the death of Jade Goody. Then the door opened and it was Himself home for a nap until he had to go out and plough snow all night.

We sat on the couch for a while. Then I looked up and out the window and saw a deer's ass in the corner of the yard. We got up to investigate.

A young doe had her head all screwed up and her tongue in the slit at the bottom of the bird feeder and she was just a hoovering out the seed. I tapped on the window. She looked at me and tensed just a little.

Then I swear she gave a little shrug before she recommenced her hoovering.

Sometimes it's difficult to see the beauty in small things when the world is shouting at you about the big things.

And you can't see the point in fucking people, as Mrs. Monkey would say.

And it won't stop snowing.

There's nothing like an animal to make you see the pointlessness of the human race.

I should get a dog.

To remind me of my place in the world.

I'm going to call him Bunk when I get him.

This is for Mrs. Monkey....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1wmgghlEagA

Saturday, March 07, 2009

Generation Loser has a great soundtrack thanks to Buck 65

Seeing the beauty in small things is what this blog is supposed to be about.

It's quite difficult to do that at the moment, because the world and the weather keeps dumpin' a load on us all, don't they.

But as I am up at the crack of dawn this morning, due to the not-so-small snoring sounds that were emanating from the body in the bed beside me, I thought maybe I'd catch up on some of the small things that are keeping me going through this long winter and recession.

1. CBC Radio 2 Drive, with Rich Terfry (aka Buck 65).
Those of you who know me will know I am a Buck 65 fan anyways. I feel we are psychically connected (but not in a scary, over-enthusiastic way of course) because Buck 65 played Whelans in Dublin the night before I left Ireland for Canada. And then I ended up living in his home province.

Anyways, after spending time in Paris and New York, and just a few months after his amazing collaboration with Symphony Nova Scotia (take one hour out of your day this weekend to listen to this concert - you will not be sorry), Mr. Terfry abandoned the Maritimes again, moved to Toronto, but thankfully, was snatched up by the CBC for its relaunch of its Radio 2. The Drive show goes out 3 - 6pm every weekday.

So it's like he's here in a way.

It's a good show.

You don't want to get out of the car... yes, the show is that good.

The howls of outrage from the baby boomers who wanted wall to wall classical are drowned out every day by the best of Canadian singer-songwriters, roots, and urban (whatever that is).

Drive focuses on Canadian music naturally, but plays international stuff too (actually, Buck plays Irish artist, Damian Rice a lot... I keep meaning to email the show to tell him to check out good Irish artists) and there's a little sub-genre of south american pop and reggae and dub going on there too.

The best part of the show - apart from the music and Rich Terfry's rich-voiced ramblings about whatever - is the live sessions he hosts. Tune in here for the back calendar.

There, now I've done a 'nice thing in Queenie's world', there's a rant that's been building for a bit....

I was reading Macleans magazine the other day and they had one of those moan, whinge, complain, horror articles (well they had many, but I'm going to talk about one in particular) that was all about 'Generation Loser: the generation that will be poorer than its parents'.

It featured a nice, unfortunate, Ontario-based couple in their thirties, who had done the usual thing - arsed through college and their twenties, then 'gotten lucky' working for an auto-parts company for $33 an hour, then gotten even luckier in meeting each other. They bought a house and started a baby, before suddenly getting their pink slips.

Now he's making $11 an hour doing something menial, she's at home with the baby, and they don't know how they will survive THE FUTURE.

According to Macleans, they are typical of a generation that are losers BECAUSE WE ARE THE FIRST TO END UP POORER THAN OUR PARENTS.

A number of things struck me about the article.

Firstly, to go from a household income of $1ook plus, to one of under $25k two months before you have your first child is friggin' scary enough, without having Macleans come in to do a feature on what a pair of losers you are. Even if Macleans is using that term to describe an entire generation and not just you two.

Secondly, our parents did well overall, yes, but their high end manufacturing jobs and conspicuous consumption has damaged the planet, and..... as far as I can make out, they have mostly all just lost their pensions in the stock market (as well as ours) ....

....so I'm kind of at a loss about why we are the losers.

Are we losers because we are the first generation not going to be able to do the same as our parents because it's unsustainable?

Because we could maybe wait a few more years and get judged on our overall performance.

Oh, that's right, Macleans being a paper-based media organization, it will probably have folded by then. ;-)

Thirdly... what is this shit about 'the first generation'?

There have been thousands of generations. I'm sure there are earlier generations that lost more of their best and brightest to the sabre-toothed tiger than their parents, or got whipped into a worse chain gang building some more insane necropolis than their parents, or had to pay more rent to the local squire than their parents, or didn't last as long in some hellish part of the Imperial bureaucracy, or WHATEVER.

It annoys me intensely that economic commentators only look back as far as the development of the Model T factory line, and generational commentators only look back as far as the development of the American middle classes when they purport to examine historical trends.

It narrows the potential for insight so much.

The simple fact remains that under the current model of economic development (i.e. the growth model), if we were all (as a generation) to 'do better' than our parent's generation, the natural world would collapse under the strain.

So we can't.

I'm sure some of us will.

But most of us won't.

People who build a future on a job making car parts in Upper Canada certainly won't, unless they change life direction rapid.

Our parents did the best they could with the decades they got, and they got some of it right and some of it wrong and we will be the same.

I wish we could all accept, internalise and celebrate this concept and move on with it.

Then instead of wringing our hands about what a loser generation we are, we could redefine progress and get ourselves out of this mess.

After that wish, I wish I could find some economic commentators who are looking at the slowdown in sustainability terms (feel free to post links).

And if I got the full complement of wishes, I wish Macleans et al would find and publish numbers that measure the benefits of sustaining and repairing what we already have, rather than droning on with the shock horror statistics measuring cataclysmic drops in the creation of mountains of poisonous plastic and chrome.

As JD Irving, the Tree Growing People would say in their ads that pretend they give a shit about nature 'that's my what if!'

Most hilarious economic meltdown occurance of the week

What: The world's stock markets plunging yet again, after hearing that the Chinese government wouldn't spend billions on a stimulus package to make things better.

Why: Did the running dogs of capitalism actually think that the Chinese government was going to save them?

Friday, March 06, 2009

Chow time on Eagle

When we moved to this house, we were very excited at the thought of lots of new critters to bond with and observe and work around, so much so that Himself went out straight away and got a big bag of cracked corn and another big bag of mixed bird seed.

So, the bird seed goes in the bird feeder at the back of the house, and the cracked corn gets spread out on the ground near the garage (or as we call it here, the building), so that it is far enough away from the house (which is also a building of course but not called a building). This allows the shyer critters to eat without disturbance.

The spare seed and corn are stored in the building.

Me, with all this largesse being spread around the property, I'm already worrying about my vegetable gardening prospects in a yard where the critters are used to being fed.

Apparently that's not going to be a problem.

Hmmmm.

It's my humble experience that if there's food, and there's critters, and there's humans, then critters beat humans to the food supply every time.

And so it goes on Eagle.

The bird feeder is not too bad. We have a large and varied clientele who seem to have organized themselves into an all day rota that involves tits and chickadees first, then jays, then other birds.

Repeat cycle.

The birds spill seed onto the frozen ground while getting it out of the feeder of course, and lately we've been seeing a northern short-tailed shrew (as in the picture) burrowing around under the snow to get at the seeds.

I'm so tempted to trap him just to pet him: his coat is the shiniest, furriest, most beautiful I've seen on a critter yet.

What a sable must look like against the snow???

I am very excited that he is living in our yard because Northern short-tailed shrews neuro-toxinate and kill snakes, which is a good thing as snakes are to Himself as bears are to Queenie.

And as we have a pond, that means we have frogs, which means we probably have some snakes around somewhere.

Further over near the building, we were absolutely thrilled to coast down the driveway one evening and catch a very big deer having himself a snack of cracked corn.

Himself in particular was beside himself with pleasure... none of this short-tailed shrew bullshit.... a critter isn't a REAL critter unless you can track it, shoot it, skin it, stick its head on your living room wall and eat what's left of it.

That evening, the deer watched us for a while, then ambled into the woods behind the house. Then, after a while, he ambled back into the yard and walked around. Chowed down a bit more, and then left.

Since then, he and his friends have been by quite a few times for an amble and a snack, but we've not had the pleasure of being here to watch them. We just find deer tracks all over the yard when we get home.

In addition, Himself has been finding pheasant tracks leading to and from the chow.

Yum yum, I keep thinking to myself.... corn-fed pheasant....

We rarely see the pheasants either though.

Himself is getting annoyed - he has a vague, irritating feeling that there's a whole pile of critters laughing at him behind his back.

He's probably right. Just after he leaves every morning, the pheasants start calling to each other. Ten minutes after I leave, I imagine they're knee deep in breakfast goodness.

This morning, I'm home waiting on the cable guy and sure enough, twenty minutes after Himself drove off, there were two pheasant, a partridge and a mess of crows standing around the cracked corn pile eating like there's no tomorrow!!

No doubt Mr. Bambi will be along later.

And the squirrel of course.

Our squirrel is one cheeky little bastard, as only a squirrel can be.

He infuriates Himself, who didn't spend a pile of money on nice cracked corn just so some rat with a furry tail could eat it all!

He's out there right now, engaging in a kind of hoover-sweeper movement across the cracked corn...

He spends a good part of every day scurrying around just to annoy Himself, with his cheeks full of corn and he has the temerity to sit on his favourite tree stump basking in the winter sunshine while chewing, right in front of Himself.

Then he got into the building, well, I think he lives there.... anyways, he managed to open the bag of bird seed, separate out every sunflower seed and eat them all.

Himself nearly had a fit when that happened, as Mr Squirrel dropped all the other seeds on the floor while sorting through them.

I sense many spats between those two occuring over the next few months. Himself might think it's his building.... but we all know who can more easily climb up on the rafters to shit on whose head.

Right now, the cable guy is here reorganizing our tv package - we're going digital in a last ditch attempt to find something to watch - and he nearly fell off the pole in excitement as a beautiful cock pheasant strolled across the lawn in front of him.

Yeah.. he's coming over for his breakfast I expect, I said.

Time for me to go to work... let the chow times begin in earnest.

Thursday, March 05, 2009

Cllr. John Foley, Edenderry - take a bow

This is priceless. You have to watch it to the end.

Cllr. Foley is the bearded gentleman towards the back.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3elLmrCmOqo

With thanks to Baz for the heads up!!

Monday, March 02, 2009

The pensions conundrum continues with the Big Three

I am reposting this article from Gwyn Morgan, founder of EnCana oil company (and current director of HSBC), because I think it's interesting in a 'how are we going to deal with this baby boomer pension issue' kind of way.

From today's Globe and Mail:

The recent Globe and Mail headline, “GM seeks government pension aid,” took me back to April, 2005, when former Canadian Auto Workers (CAW) president and labour movement icon Bob White received the Public Policy Forum's prestigious Lifetime Achievement Award.

Mr. White's acceptance speech was delivered with the serenity possible only for those of us who can savour our career's journey freed from the load of full-time stakeholder accountability weighing upon our shoulders. Nevertheless, as this retired union leader recounted his career, the most repeated word could just as easily have come from the memoirs of a famous war general.

That word was “fight” and it seemed Mr. White had spent his entire career fighting a never-ending series of battles: fighting to break away from the U.S.-based United Auto Workers union to form the CAW, fighting against the Canada-U.S. free-trade agreement, and on and on.
But one of the biggest battles Mr. White recounted, and the victory he held up as his finest hour, was the strike-driven extraction of those rich CAW pension plans that may ultimately prove to be the deadweight that drags the Detroit Three down to their demise.

As co-chairmen of that Public Policy Forum dinner, Ontario Premier Dalton McGuinty and I alternated the presentation of awards. As it turned out, I presented Mr. White's award. However unlikely an image this free enterpriser and that lifelong socialist made as podium fellows that evening, it's just as well that it was me and not Mr. McGuinty who presented Mr. White's award.

Now that federal Industry Minister Tony Clement has made it very clear that pensions are a provincial responsibility, it is up to Queen's Park to decide whether hard-pressed Ontario taxpayers should bail out the spiralling CAW pension funding shortfalls. In wrestling with this toxic dilemma, at least Mr. McGuinty will not have to recall honouring the architect of one of the biggest financial and political problems he will ever face.

At the end of 2007, GM Canada's pension plan alone had a shortfall of over $4-billion and, given the collapse of securities markets since then, the current shortfall is probably closer to $6-billion. But it is going to get much worse.

At GM, the pension plan Mr. White was so proud of now has 34,000 retirees versus only 14,000 active employees, and each time the foundering company throws workers overboard to try and keep the sinking ship afloat, most of those workers climb back on board as pensioners.

In an opening salvo designed to coerce government to include pension bailouts in the billions of dollars in taxpayer largess already requested, GM Canada's vice-president of corporate and environmental affairs, David Paterson, said: “Instead of carrying one work force like our competition at Honda and Toyota, we're effectively carrying three additional work forces out there, and those will grow further.”

Grow indeed. GM's bailout filings predict that its work force in Canada will drop by half next year to 7,000, and most of those laid off will be added to the pension fund. So, for every active worker, GM will need to pay pension costs for almost six retirees. While I haven't seen corresponding data for Chrysler and Ford, their pension plans are designed in the same disastrous way.

Even if Queen's Park were to saddle Ontarians with the huge decades-long expense of the Detroit Three pension plans, it wouldn't prevent more layoffs. The breathtaking rate at which the Detroit auto makers are burning through cash makes it highly probable that another bailout-begging trip to Ottawa and Queen's Park won't be far off.

Some insight into that question may be gained by looking at the $13.4-billion (U.S.) granted to GM by the U.S. Congress in December. GM has stated that without more funds, they will be in bankruptcy by the end of March. That works out to a cash burn rate of around $4-billion a month for GM alone, not including their burgeoning pension shortfall.

Meanwhile, GM and Chrysler continue their bailout dances on both sides of the border.
GM Canada's request is reported to be around $7-billion (Canadian). Using their projected 2010 employment number of 7,000 yields a bailout cost of a whopping $1,000,000 per worker.

And despite union and corporate assertions that their pitiful state is all because of the economic crisis, in actual fact, the Detroit Three were bleeding billions in red ink years before last fall's financial meltdown, at the same time as competitors like Toyota and Volkswagen were racking up record profits.

In the midst of this job-destroying financial crisis, and if the U.S. Congress keeps handing out cash to Detroit auto makers, Canadian politicians face the threat of the closing of all GM and Chrysler plants if they don't ante up.

But let's be realistic. The 18-million-a-year North American vehicle market is never coming back and a legacy of lethal decisions by auto executives acceding to union demands means they can't be competitive in a smaller market against more nimble and lower-cost auto makers.

The idea of taxing beleaguered Canadians to fund auto bailouts is already unpopular across the country. As politicians consider operating cash and pension bailouts now, imagine how much more unpopular those decisions will be when these companies fail anyway, taking billions of dollars of taxpayers' money down the drain.

The sad thing is that if only a fraction of the taxpayer money wasted on extending the tenuous life of these doomed companies were spent on transitional financial support and retraining, taxpayers and auto workers would both have a much brighter future.

Sunday, March 01, 2009

Generals January and February have retreated... one to go

I just happened to notice on my blog dashboard, as I waited interminably for my laptop to get with the program (it being on its last legs for the last while) and open a new post page, that this is my 599th post.

I am quite proud of that. I'm not noted for being a sticker at things that involve work or routine.

Apart from work generally, and the daily routine.

Well done, Queenie, pour yourself a glass of wine and say cheers.

Thanks, I just did.

The other cause for celebration today is that it is the 1st March, which means that February is over for another year.

I heard someone say recently on the radio that there were only three things wrong with Canada - January, February and March.

Probably. March is generally not as bad as January and February, because the days are longer and there are *warm* days. But today the universe hurled ice pellets at the front of the house all day and covered the driveway in white again. A heady combination of rain, freezing rain, and snow has us in its grips for the next couple of days.

This means that driving and walking becomes a nightmare.

However, the upside is no shovelling.

March... at least in March there is an end in sight. Easter is soonish. It is possible to get up after dawn and drive home before sunset if you work normal hours.

February is just dead. Four weeks of unmitigating cold, damp, snow, rain, freezing rain, ice and wind. You get up in the dark and shovel the previous night's precipitation off the car in minus 10 - 15 degree cold, then shiver for eight miles until the heater starts to work. Any attempt at fresh air during the day involves slipping and falling, or being blown over by the wind, or getting caught in the snow/ rain/ sleet that has decided to fall at lunchtime.

In February nobody goes anywhere, or calls anyone, or does anything. Everyone just sits home and moans about the weather and their miserable lives.

We do try to be healthy. We made an effort every weekend and we got a few hikes in, but after one particularly icy one, which did more damage to Himself's back than good, we said to hell with this till March.

I wonder if I had actually thought about the fact that Canada is the second coldest country in the world (I'm assuming this is true because the man on the weather channel said it), would I have settled here.

However, I have not been alone in hating this winter in particular: the general consensus is that this has been one of the longest winters ever, that Canada has had two crappy winters in a row and a bummer of a summer last year so WE ARE OWED.

And we - idiots that we are - we moved house in the middle of it.

Of course, we know bigger idiots who moved twice.

The people who used to own our house - the LAZY BASTINERS - as we like to call them, left us with a busted furnace, a non-functioning water softener, rooms full of animal hair, and a yard full of dog shit. We got all these issues sorted out in a few days, but we were very angry at the lack of consideration.

IT WAS JANUARY AND IT WAS -18 OUT, YOU INCOMPETENT, LAZY, SELFISH, PENNY-PINCHING SOANDSOs!!

Halifax is a small town and I will find you some day if I can ever be bothered to go in search of you at the branch of the large electronics chain where you work.

Yes, I've been noting where your mail is coming from, dude....

And when I do bother my ass some day when I have nothing better to do, you will be sorry that you decided not to care that I would have no heat for three days in mid-January, after I had spent every penny I had on your house.

When we talk about what you did very loudly in front of the entire store.

And even when I never bother to do any of this because it is too much effort on my part, it doesn't matter that I don't ever find you, because your karma will.

But enough of that... we don't really care that the people who sold the house to us were so greedy they wouldn't spend a few hundred bucks on the furnace before they left. We are used to dealing with selfish, greedy, unreasonable people. It's best just to get on with life as best you can, let those kind of people get on with their own greed until it sinks them, and hope to hell you don't get dragged down with the shipwreck.

Oh, and by the way, the reason you had to lie about whether or not the basement leaked is because you put the rain gutters up assways... once they were fixed you were telling the truth, the basement doesn't leak!

Home repair is really not your forte is it, Mr. FLAT SCREEN TV Guy.

Other than those minor mishaps, the house has been fantastic: as Accent Monkey said, at least when you move in in January you know what works. We have settled in well and we are looking forward to the end of the winter and the re-emergence of the garden.

And company of course. Lots of company.

Won't that be a novelty after the last six weeks!!

Saturday, February 28, 2009

New France is for sale!!

JD Irving, the clear-cutting lumber giant of the Maritimes, or the 'tree-growing people' as they like to call themselves, has arranged for an American real estate broker, LandVest of Portland, Maine, http://www.landvest.com/, to sell approximately 170,000 acres (70,000 hectares) of South West Nova Scotia to the highest bidder.

The acreage is listed in three blocks, and you can see some photos of these beautiful lands on Landvest's website here

http://www.landvest.com/property/NS0101/1/ .



The sale is a sealed bid auction due to close on April 9th.

The first block is Weymouth Timberlands in Digby Co. (128,000 acres) including most of the Sissiboo River drainage area, Long Tusket Lake, Silver River, and historic New France.

Anyone who knows me knows this is a very special place for me and Himself, and for all our friends in Digby County.

This historic area was settled by a French family who built a village in the woods - the first electrified town in Nova Scotia, with a railway to Weymouth, and a hydro-power plant, a pub, and every amenity you can imagine.

The village is in ruins now, but you can still walk around New France, camp nearby near one of the lakes, canoe down the old Mi'k Maq paddling routes, used for thousands of years to enable the original settlers of this place to travel easily through the region.

This river and lake system, and the forests that surround them is one of the few places left in South Western Nova Scotia where you can completely get away from it all. Acid rain has already wreaked havoc on it, but it is slowly starting to recover from that.

Let's not lose it to someone who doesn't care about it like we do.

I don't know the other two blocks as well, but I can imagine they are beautiful too, judging from the photos. They include:

Tusket River Lakes in Clare and Yarmouth Co. (28,000 acres) including Barrio Lake, Barrio Falls and the east bank of the Tusket to North Kempt; and Carleton River Lakes in Clare and Yarmouth Co. (17,000 acres) including the east and south sides of Ogden Lake and the east bank of the Carleton River to Lake Fanning.

A group called Buy Back Nova Scotia has started a coalition of diverse individuals and groups to urge the government of Nova Scotia to purchase these Irving lands and thereby halt the further sale of provincial beauty spots to those who might restrict access to the lands, rivers and streams, lakes and wetlands. Maintaining public access to lands and waters for recreation is critical and will become more so in the future.

The people involved are conservationists and ATVers, foresters, fishermen, hunters and hikers, bicyclists and birders, canoeists, campers and cross country skiers, photographers and writers.

Despite their differences about how to spend time in the wilderness, they are working together on this issue, to urge municipal and provincial politicians to purchase the JD Irving lands before more of the province disappears behind “No Trespassing’ signs and locked gates.

A public meeting to rally tri-county support for BUY BACK NOVA SCOTIA has been organized for Sunday, March 8, at 2 p.m., in the gym at the Yarmouth campus, NSCC.

A letter-writing campaign has begun too.

Please help with this. Details of who to write to on http://www.buybacknovascotia.com/

Friday, February 27, 2009

Breakfast Roll Man abandons the Soldiers of Destiny... the muesli parties are on the rise

I despair of my countrymen.... frigging despair...

This is splashed across all the papers this morning:

"An opinion poll conducted by Millward Brown IMS for today’s Irish Independent shows Fine Gael on 30 per cent (up three points since the last election), Fianna Fáil 25 per cent (down 17 points), Labour on 22 per cent (up 12 points)...."

"According to the poll, Fianna Fail would lose anything up to 30 Dail seats if an election was called today. The findings are stark: just over one-in-five voters think their leader is doing a good job; one-in-10 are satisfied with the Government.

The plight of the 'Breakfast Roll Man' -- the group of newly prosperous Celtic Tiger cubs credited with sealing the last election for Fianna Fail -- appears to have mirrored the party's recent misfortunes. The most marked drop in support has been among young professionals in the 25-34 and 35-49 age categories, who are abandoning the party in their droves."

The corruption, the cronyism, and the pathetic inability to look after the sick, the vulnerable and the less well to do in our society was okay while you had a job and could borrow on your property portfolio's value, was it?

But now you're not doing so well, it's time to get rid of Fianna Fail.

RATS..... LEAVING THE SHIP.... SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED... GRUMBLE GRUMBLE GRUMBLE....

Monday, February 23, 2009

Gingers gone... what's next!

On a sad note, Ginger’s Tavern on Barrington St, home of many a pint had by Queenie and friends of hers, including Mr. and Mrs Monkey and the Byrnes on many occasions including the Monkey wedding, and separately Redser Byrne, as well as Jersey Girl and her Boy, Polly, Shazz and many others..... well, Ginger's Tavern closed last night forever.

The owners are moving out of town to focus on their micro-brewery.

Himself says I am a pub joner.

Everytime I leave a place, my local closes down.

Ginger will hold a special place in my heart. Not as special as Smoothies. But special enough.

What I am really worried about is the long, slow death of Barrington St., the main street of Halifax city.

Is there any of the multiple 'development' organizations out there working on this?

Fusion Halifax maybe??

Or the Chamber of Commerce?

Or the Downtown Business Commission??

You know, boys and girls, if you don't stop this slide, soon there'll be nowhere downtown to engage in your true raison d'etre, which is of course to swap business cards.

Book Reviews 2008, part 2: Non-fiction titles

The second round of book reviews is another short category – non-fiction. However, compared to previous years, this category is storming ahead in the lifetime stakes with a total of six entries.

It’s not often that Queenie reads six books that aren’t story books.

These were all second hand items I picked up in desperation, when I didn’t have the price of a novel, or even a CanLit novel (they being cheaper than non CanLit here in Canada) on me, but still needed something to read.

They were all pretty good despite their bought for the sake of buying a book rather than for the sake of owning them status. And there are one or two gems in here.

The Little Immigrants, the Orphans who came to Canada by Kenneth Bagnell, published in 1980, was a book I picked up in a store called ‘So many books, So little time, which we happened upon during our road trip to Algonquin last October. It’s a little shack down a side street in Huntsville, but when you enter the shack, it turns out to be quite the store. Second hand books line shelves that surround the real purpose of the store – tchotchkas and dried flowers. Plus the owner had two of the nicest dogs I have ever seen lounging around a second hand bookstore.

The book is described on the cover as ‘one of the finest pieces of Canadian social history to be written’ and the author was a respected Globe and Mail and Star newspapers, which of course are THE newspapers in Canada. It apparently spent one year on the bestsellers list when it came out.

As befits a book about the littlest immigrants, it is a little book. It really should have been called ‘the littlest hobos’ but I guess that title was taken.

The book traces the fate of over 80,000 orphans or indigent children who were shipped from England (primarily from East End London) to Canada between the 1860s and the 1930s. When they got to Canada, they were dispersed across this vast country to work as farm labourers. A number of organizations were involved in ‘saving’ the street arabs, as they were then known.

The collection, transportation and dispersal of these children was organized mostly by evangelical Christian organizations at first. A number of redoubtable Christian women were involved; women who steam-rolled over the concerns of the Canadian and English authorities.

Despite a serious enquiry that uncovered wholesale abuse and defrauding of these children (they were supposed to be fed, clothed, educated and paid, and a lot of the time, not much of any of these things happened), Canada’s need for cheap agricultural labour and England’s need to rid itself of street children overcame the Dickensian concerns of the media and the child advocates.

The collection and transportation was a bit hit and miss for a number of years. Then a young man named Dr. Barnado got involved and the process hit its stride. Thomas Barnado, born and educated in Dublin of course, sent 30,000 children to Canada. The book spends quite a bit of time on Barnado, his life and works, and the obstacles he overcame with his unwavering zeal that his choice for these children was the right one.

He sounds like a terrible person… one of those individuals so consumed with his calling his actions towards friends and family are monstrous. This monstrosity almost becomes his downfall, as a falling out with a friend results in a plot against him by a number of other evangelists.

It seems Barnado is yet another mixed blessing imposed by the Irish on the British. Having said that, his legacy organization is still fairly highly regarded in some places. But the book cleared up the rationale for a lot of moral standpoints I found strange about the old Barnardos.

The book is interesting in a number of ways. Firstly, it documents the terrible treatment that a lot of these children received on isolated and primitive farms located deep in provincial Canada (all in the name of Jesus of course), and reiterates the fact that in Victorian England and Canada, children were not children as we now know them to be.

Secondly, the book describes very well the result of concerns finally getting a media airing when various well got individuals questioned the value (to the children) of ‘the importation of waifs’. The immediate reaction by God-fearing Canadians was to condemn the practice outright, because Canada should not have to house the scum and wastrels of England.

Nice kick to moral touch there, Upper Canada.

Finally, the book has some local flavour as one of the homes where the children were housed before they were sent to their new masters was in Bedford, near Halifax.

I meant to go find the home last summer and forgot. I must do it this spring.

Many of the stories outlined in the book were from Nova Scotia too, and they don’t come out well from it.

Worth a read if you ever find it.

The Secret Life of Lobsters, by Trevor Corson, is quite simply the best biological book I have ever read. I followed it with The Lobster Chronicles, by Linda Greenlaw (who is the actual woman who is represented by an actress trying to talk the skipper played by George Clooney out of his fool’s errand in A Perfect Storm).

After she lost her friend in that storm, she gave up her career as a swordfish boat captain, and went home to a small island off Maine to fish for lobster. The book describes a season and its not very good. Although I get the sense she was very contrained by the fact that all her neighbours were a little tense about the writing of it.

She does get the whole ‘living on a small island, knowing everyone, knowing their faults and failings and adjusting to them so nobody will kill each other’ thing very well. I’m just not sure it’s as riveting a read as she thought it would be.

Salutary…

As for the fact that I spent quite a lot of my reading time last year reading up on lobsters… it’s all about the fishery, doncha know… you gotta get with the game when you’re in Nova Scotia.

It was funny… when I finished reading The Secret Life of Lobsters, Himself and I were down visiting his folks on Long Island for the weekend. I was so impressed by the book I couldn’t stop talking about it or lobsters, much to everyone’s amusement because usually I pay no heed to the talk of fish. Eventually I had to haul it out of my bag to show them what was pushing my buttons.

Turned out every guy in the room had read the book when it came out first.

It is a great book. Even if you have no interest in lobsters, fishermen, the sea, crustaceans, ocean currents, the Atlantic, North Eastern USA/ Canada, or whatever, you will still love this book.

It is such a labour of love. It is beautifully written. It is painstakingly researched. It understands that a lobster is just one example of the beauty, uniqueness, humour and genius of evolution. In fact, in the dying days of the Empire of Creationism (which is when I read it), it really was a refreshing reminder that the USA can do so much better than Bush and his cronies.

Did you know that lobsters urinate on each others heads when they’re horny? Lobster sex is the most interesting animal sex I have ever read about.

But even more interesting than the description of lobster sex is the description of how US scientists figured out every aspect of lobster sex.

And that’s what I love about this book; it’s celebration of enquiry.

I found Alexander the Great, Journey to the end of the Earth, by Norman F Cantor in the bargain bin at Chapters for $2. As Kitty was doing Classical History I bought it for her, but it ended up being read by me as I had suspected.

It was okay… the maps weren’t great and I would have preferred more what and less why, as we don’t know why.

Late in the year, I found a new second hand bookstore, DustJackets, in the bowels of the Aliant building on Barrington St. and celebrated by buying a copy of A Brief History of The Celts, Peter Bereford Ellis’ recommended tome for beginners in the subject.

It’s a very good, concise overview of every aspect of Celtic society. He breaks it down into aspects of Celtic life – laws, women, religion, politics, architecture, art, money, trade, etc. He does a good job with shitty sources. That’s the problem with the Celts – it’s either some Roman making up stuff about how they’re all mental and they eat brains, or it’s some monk in a monastery in Ireland banging on about Lugh of the Long Hand and giants and such like.

Ellis’ book is famous for being a serious attempt to make sense of it all and I must say I got a lot out of it.

Plus, I found out that my maternal surname is over 3,000 years old and is one of the oldest surviving surnames in Europe.

So there.

Finally, I bought a copy of Getting Past No this year, because it was time I did. This is the sequel to Getting to Yes, the bestselling book on negotiation written by the guys who invented interest-based bargaining.

If you haven’t read GTY yet, then what are you doing reading this article. Go out and buy it. When you get it, I mean get it as in get it…. practice that for a while and then buy Getting Past No.

If you haven’t done any of that stuff yet, and you have children who are going to be older than five soon, then just go straight past GTY and buy Getting Past No.

It’s good for puppies too.

That’s it for the non-fiction.

Onto CanLit...

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Book Reviews 2008, part 1: Travel Literature

I wasn't quite sure how to do this review job - to do several book reviews in one post and then do nothing for months on end; to try to plough through all the reviews and post them one by one, or by far the most useful idea - to tackle the reviews thematically.

Or to just not do anything and blog about something totally pointless.

However, I'm home alone during a big snow storm so there ain't nuttin' else to do today, work being completed.

I'm thinking maybe I'll tackle a theme.

My themes are: Travel Literature, Non-fiction, CanLit, Literary Fiction.

I know, I know, my originality is stunning.

I may as well start with travel literature, as they are my favourite types of book now that I'm getting old and bored with fiction, and I'm too poor to actually travel anywhere anymore.

Having said that, I only read four TL books last year, for a variety of reasons.

Firstly, the genre is getting squeezed by the useful but not literature Lonely Planet type missives that everyone seems to want to buy now, and consequently, there aren't that many new titles published every year.

Secondly, I have read many, many of the existing travel books, as the Queen Dad has bought extensively in the genre over the years.

Thirdly, I am done with grumpy men who have a cynical attitude to life, especially since Inspectors Morse and Taggart left this world. So, I can't face reading Bill Bryson, or any more Theroux, or anything in that style anymore, and that's what's mostly available.

Fourthly, it's getting more difficult to get copies of what's on my list of 'great travel literature I must read before I go blind or die.' There's one shelf in Chapters and one shelf in Doull's second hand store and that's it for perusal options in Halifax.

And of course I am not supposed to shop at Chapters now, because of the Palestinian conflict. Why I don't really understand.

Yes, yes, yes, I know I can buy books on Amazon and such sites and they have a wide selection of travel literature. Interestingly, there is a list on Amazon.com that contains many of the books I am planning to read: Interesting Amazon travel literature list.

But y'see, Doulls now give you an extra 10% off your books if you promise not to buy anything online for the rest of the day, and I always do and then forget to go shopping online after the 24 hour period is up.

I know, I am pathetic.

This year I will buy more travel books.

In particular, I will track down:

- Eric Newby's book about Ireland, which I only found out about when I opened The Big Red Train Ride the other day and saw it listed in his previous publications;
- William Dalrymple's From the Holy Mountain, A Journey among the Christians of the Middle East
- Freya Stark's A Winter in Arabia
- Something by Pico Iyer, who is supposed to be shit hot.
- Larry McMurty's Roads, which is supposed to be good on the States

So of course, if you have any of them in a pile marked Oxfam shop, put it in an envelope and send it to me and I will make a contribution to a similar charity!!!!

Back to the task in hand, last year's crop.

As I said, there were four.

There's a trio of older style travel writers - Thubron, Newby and Raban - whom I admire both in terms of their journeys and their ways of describing them. So I am trying to collect all their works. I was lucky last year - I got one from each of them.

And finally, I found Robert Carver's Paradise with Serpents, Travels in the Lost World of Paraguay. I couldn't believe it when I saw he had another book set in a country that LOVES DEH GUNS, because I own a copy of Carver's first travel book, The Accursed Mountains: Journeys in Albania.

The premise of Accursed Mountains was, Carver gets into Albania after Hoxha falls and all hell is breaking loose. He spends much time in Tirana trying to get into the countryside while not really wanting to be in that much danger. Time passes, he gets to travel to the villages and he spends his time avoiding getting shot and being terrified. He finally leaves in a big relief and writes a book about it.

It was pretty diverting and had some interesting descriptions of Albania. And he had a quote from William Dalrymple on the inside cover. Which must be the Holy Grail of aspiring travel writers...

....Well, what do you know? Paradise with Serpents is the South American version of the same book.

Guess when you find your groove you should stick to it...

Despite that nasty comment, I'd still recommend the book if you are interested in reading about Paraguay.

Lucky for me, I read it shortly before the Paraguayan elections last year, and consequently was able to appear knowledgeable about Paraguayan politics in front of some people who are still gobsmacked at my worldliness.

The book has lots of side bars about La Lynch, the Irish-born concubine of Paraguayan Presidente Lopez, which may interest Irish or French readers.

Mainly though, the book has piles and piles of useful anecdotes on how people manage to live in a hyper-inflationary economy bankrupted by the usual troika of corrupt government, fraudulent banks and business, and of course, armies of lazy public servants grown fat on the backs of the bare-foot, illiterate workers.

When Carver gets there the middle classes, who encompass some of these groups and some other people, and with whom he mainly socialises, are watching with not a little fear and trepidation as the lower orders arm themselves with big guns paid for with drug profits.

It's all very interesting if you are interested in reading about such scenarios at the moment.

Which I suspect many people are.

I like Carver because his writing is very honest. He spends most of the book hiding in the Gran Hotel in Asuncion, terrified he's going to get shot. This is because when he does venture out of the hotel or even out of Asuncion, he usually nearly gets shot. His trips out of town are centred around finding a long lost uncle who vanished into the jungle many years previously.

This type of travel scenario makes Paradise with Serpents not really a travel book; so much of his journey is spent in one place, there's more of an extended journalistic feature feel to large parts of the book. But that is inherently interesting if you like reading about the politics and society of other places.

One other comment, one of the characters he hangs with, a terribly nice person called Gabrielle, tells Carver at some point that she has invested all her savings in an apartment in west London, to avoid losing money in dodgy Paraguay.... I'm wondering how that's going for her now...

Slowly down the Ganges is the story of a journey taken in the early sixties by Eric Newby and his wife Wanda (who saved his life during WWII, the story of which is recounted in one of his other books) down the Ganges from Hardawar to the Bay of Bengal.

I love Eric Newby even though all his trips have 'classics' which have been done to death. I love Eric because a) he did them first, and b) if I held a gun to Tony Wheeler's head he'd probably admit that Newby was one of his inspirations, but Newby chose not to destroy independent travel by enabling the hoi polloi to do it.

(I consider myself hoi polloi by the way).

If you don't already know, Eric Newby is the guy who gave up a shop job in Manchester in the late fifties to travel, went to tribal Pakistan during the winter, and subsequently wrote A Short Walk in the Hindu Kush, which is one of the greats.

Slowly down the Ganges is a book that brilliantly describes how important it is to have moments, when your romantic illusions about travel are being systematically destroyed by petty beauracrats.

As opposed to corrupt cops with big guns.

Newby and his glorious Wanda don't just get a bus down the length of the Ganges, he proposes to do the trip by boat. Unfortunately, boats come, boats go, boats are not suitable for the depth of the Ganges, or the tide, or whatever, and the author, his wife and their trusty crew have to beg, borrow, bribe, steal and swap craft at every staging post on the journey. Plus haul his considerable luggage on and off boats and swamps and sand pits, and cliffs and sink holes etc at all hours of the day and night.

Wanda is the woman who can feed 100 sailors with two fish, some daal, and the light of the Indian moon. Newby spends much of the book amazed that such an extraordinary woman could love him (which is the other reason why I love his writing).

If you've been to India you will appreciate the vast chunks of this book that deal with lying around waiting for somewhere to open or lunch to finish or 'payment' to be made or whatever.

Slowly is the key word in this particular title.

Mirror to Damascus, by Colin Thubron is the description of a year the author spent in the Syrian capital. It is very early Thubron, and he starts to pick at many of the themes he deals with in his later writing - theories of migration and nomadic culture, the spread of Islam, the great trade routes of Asia and their impact on history. Much of what he discusses in this book is returned to in his brilliant quartet of books about Asia.

It is really interesting, when you read a lot of travel literature, you start to encounter varied descriptions of the same place. It can be quite disconcerting.

Currently I am reading a book about the Queen of Sheba written by a Californian documentary maker with a writing style that is hampered by the lens he uses instead of a pen. The writer, whose name I am too lazy to go to the sitting room to look up, describes Damascus as a Russian engineered concrete monstrosity that surrounds an impressive mosque.

It is itself an impressive description. Memorable. If surrounded by a mass of visual concrete that would be great on a storyboard but is not so good in a book format.

It also destroys the heart of Thubron's description of the same city.

Thubron's description of the city is magical. His Damascus is layered from the inside out, from the bottom up, from the outside in, from the ceiling to the ground, from the sepulchre to the minaret. There is not a layer or cross hatch of the city that he doesn't turn his attention to during his year.

The blurb on the back describes it as a 'work of love' and it is definitely a paeon. But Thubron's style is so classical and clear that the love doesn't ever veer the prose near the colour purple.

Mirror to Damascus was published in 1967, a couple of years after Newby's Ganges adventure.
It is an altogether different type of adventure, more Victorian in its style and length. Colin Thubron takes rooms in the city for a year and burrows down through the history, geography, archaeology and other aspects of this ancient city and culture, trying to pin down the city's soul, and by doing so, perhaps the soul of Middle Eastern Islam.

If we want to figure out the dichotomy in architectural descriptions, maybe it's time-bound.

Perhaps the mid-sixties was a halcyon period before the advent of the Soviet engineers that seem to have destroyed all of Thubron's travel adventures ever since.

In summation, you need to be a Thubron fan, or an Orientalist, or a fan of esoteric musings grouped around a single theme (I am trying to be all of these things) to like this book.

Ideally, you should read it in Damascus.

Finally, my travel literature collection expanded by one more book in 2008. This time it was an early publication by my beloved Jonathan Raban. I chanced upon his Hunting Mr. Heartbreak one day in Doull's, to my great joy.

Hunting Mr. Heartbreak is Raban's take on the States. The eponymous Mr. Heartbreak is Hector St. John de Crevecouer, a fellow emigrant who wrote about how wonderful it was to move to the newly formed United States.

All the great writers have to do the States. All of them have to do it their way. Raban, being Raban, has to approach it from the sea. He leaves England on a ro-ro called The Atlantic Conveyor. Because of this, and because of his tracing of a previous emigrant, the opening sentence is a reworking of the classic, 'having arrived in Liverpool, I took passage for the New World.

Happily for Queenie, The Atlantic Conveyor stops in Halifax port before it heads to New York (oh, why don't more of them do that!!), so she has the wonderful surprise of having her favourite travel writer describe the city in which she lives as he found it in 1990.

He ends up at the Split Crow, of course, that bastion of bad behaviour beloved of visiting crews. Later on he says:

In my shore-going tie, I was overdressed for the town. Everyone else appeared to have just come in from an afternoon's duck shooting. They dressed, not to stand out, but to blend in, in muddy browns, greens, beiges, and plaids, as if the height of Haligonian fashion was perfect camouflage. There was an above average incidence of beards, a below average incidence of jewellry. That cardinal provincial sin, of 'getting above yourself', was not a Nova Scotia weakness; the people of Halifax had carried unshowiness to such a point of fine moral principle that I felt my striped Italian tie was standing out among them as an act of insufferable urban arrogance.

Where they were rich, and showily rich, was in body space. Everyone carried at least 300 cubic feet of the stuff round with them on the streets. Life on a sidewalk in Halifax was a lonely business, with people swerving aside to give you a wide berth, as if you had a contagious social disease.

I nearly laughed myself sick when I read this. Nineteen years on, little has changed. Maybe a few more people on the streets, but not many.

Raban gets to New York and spends some time with the rich people who inhabit the rarified atmosphere of the condos high above Central Park. He doesn't think much of them of course and calls them the Air People. He sublets an apartment from 'Alice' and snoops into her life as much as he can and rips her to shreds in his book - I pity the poor girl, who was probably just trying to keep the apartment for her return to the city.

After a sojourn closer to the streets of New York (this book was written before zero tolerance and the peace that brought) and some encounters with the Street People of Mayor Koch's era, Raban has had enough of both crime and shallowness, and heads out into the heartland of America. The rest of the book deals with time spent in Alabama, Seattle, and the Florida Keys.

The section on Florida in particular is fabulous. Obsessed with boats and the water, Raban charters a fishing boat and heads into the Keys. He becomes enamoured with the idea of the Keys as the traditional piracy hiding grounds. His repeated attempts to get the Coast Guard and various other law-protection agencies to tell him the best way to hide in the Everglades are hilarious and really ironic when you read them with the impact of 9-11 still reverberating throughout North America.

How must Raban feel when he thinks back on the innocence of this time.... how must we all feel. I remember feeling we had hit the absolute bottom of the pits of corruption, cynicism and despair. Compared to now, the early 90s were a Disney movie...

I highly recommend this book for a glimpse of the USA that we all learned to love through MTV USA and the tv shows of the early nineties. It's a USA that has since disappeared, but Raban nails it. And like the rest of us, he liked it so much he moved there (he settled in Seattle).

There. That was a very convoluted way of reviewing four books. I will have to undertake a review redux on the rest, or I'll never get finished.

It has stopped snowing. Would winter be drawing to a close?

Don't get your hopes up Queenie, there's always one more storm...!

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

The Bare Hook

I thought that I was like everyone on the planet in my close following of the soon to be called Second Great Depression. It turns out I was wrong. There are people on the planet who aren't thinking about this crisis. More about them later.

As an Irish person living in Canada I am having a mild schizoid response to the soon to be called SGD, as the Irish person in me wants to sit in a corner Peig-like, rocking myself into a hysterical fit with my smelly shawl over my face.

The east coast Canadian resident in me, who doesn't work in an industry related to cars and petroleum could give a shit about the whole thing.

The reader in me is interested in the narrative of the STBCSGD.

Which of my faces to wear? Which, which??

So far, I've been veering towards 'it'll be alright, Nova Scotia can't really tank much further, pass the potato chips and put on the next episode of The Wire'.

Then a couple of things happened this evening and my potential panic got viralled (is that a verb? It should be.)

A friends noted what appeared to be concern at the crisis on Facebook. As this friend is one of the few of us who is understood to understand money stuff he got some 'what have you read? what? what?' comments.

To which he responded, the Dow.

Classy!

Another friend, whose opinion I also respect, wrote that he had tried to blog about the Irish demiracle-isation and found it too depressing. As this friend is one of my 'black humour and pithy analysis of the underlying themes' reference points on world affairs, I had to restrain myself from the 'no! no! no!' comments. I don't want to further depress him.

Then I had to get back to normal, and have supper with my beloved and then upload his cool photos of a snowy owl for his friends to see on Facebook.

How much of our world we live online now?

During which time we discussed the soon to be called Second Great Depression over the pork chops and baked potatoes and subsequent PhotoFiltre action and photo-posting.

I explained the premise of the article I had found when I typed Credit Default Swaps for Dummies into Google. After I had decided maybe I should give a shit after all.

Firstly Himself laughed uproariously at the punchline. Which appeared to be, you didn't have to own the asset to buy insurance on it.

Then he spent a bit of time figuring out how we'd work such a scheme in our favour if in fact, we had our own version of a CDS.

If we could buy insurance on say, our friend's Kevin's house, even though we don't own it, and get a big pay out if the house burned down.

Then he spent some more time figuring out how many other people we know would have been filled in enough on the situation to have bought insurance. Say, if people started to notice that Kevin had a stupid habit of dumping his still-warm wood stove ashes in the green bin and figured he'd been leaving it a little close to the side of the house. And then looked up the forecast and fixed on a particular night when it wasn't going to snow or rain. And then bought the insurance.

Then he got mad.

Who in the hell sold this insurance to other people?

All of which, on top of everything else, got me a little upset.

But thankfully, I keep our green bin out in the middle of the yard away from everything.

Himself said 'it's like the fishery.'

When you live with a fisherman, even a former fisherman, everything in the world is like the fishery.

Major things like the bible are of course, all about the fishery.

And of course, global finance is like the fishery.

You grow up in the fishery and there's loads of fish, but you can't afford a boat so you go out on someone else's boat and fish, but you can't get much fish. You spend your time thinking about all the fish you could catch if you just had a licence. And a boat. And some nets. And sonar/ radar/ GPS.

Then one day, after a lot of lobbying, the government sets up a fisherman's bank and you get a cheap loan to buy a boat and all the accoutrements and you go out fishing a lot. And you make a lot of money and have a much better life than your parents.

But that's not enough, because you can catch more fish, and there's a market for it and so you buy a dragger.

And so there was a whole generation that left school early and grew up making eighty, ninety, hundred thousand a year just catching boatloads of fish. And a whole generation of financial services executives left college early to get bonuses giving these guys cheap money to buy toys, because they could afford to pay for it out of next year's catch.

And then one day, Queenie, we went out to catch next year's boat payments and car payments and ATV payments and whatever else payments, and there was nothing out on the ocean for us but a bare hook.

That's all it is now, Queenie, it's nothing but a bare hook.

Yes dear, I know it's like the fishery and that means it's really terrible and sad.

- I may seem slightly cynical, but I have heard this story one hundred thousand and four times.

It's just this time, dear, I think maybe the whole world's run out of fish at the same time.

It got me thinking though.

What makes former fishermen really squirm and rage and howl about the death of the fishery is the deadweight of the guilt of their own culpability. The fact that they knew they were destroying the fishery by dragging, but they did it anyway to make their boat payments.

Despite the efforts of legions of university researchers, despite the warnings of generations of environmentalists, nobody who had the power to break the cycle even tried to figure out how to stop it.

They try to make themselves feel better about it of course.

Nobody did anything because it was all about the fish processors needing big catches to pay for their processing plants and value chain modifications.

Goddamn big business.


Maybe.

But nobody made them go out fishing.

Or did they?

It was also all about jobs in rural communities. Crappy, back-breaking, seven bucks an hour processing jobs in rural communities that had nothing else and never would, unless they found oil offshore.

Goddamn small rural communities thinking they have a right to survive and rear another generation of kids on minimum wage jobs!!

Doesn't have quite the same righteous ring to it as goddamn big business, does it? In fact, who'd be against that?

Who'd be against a whole generation being able to stay home if they wanted to?

The deep depression caused by this deep depression is related to the fact that we all knew we were heading towards the bare hook a long time ago and nobody did anything to stop it.

There's no amount of trade union marches going to get rid of that nagging sense of guilt.

Standing on the deck after supper, listening to the sea pound behind us and the coyotes howl in the woods beyond the house, Himself said 'there isn't one person I work with ever talks about any of this. It just never comes up.'

Interesting.

Why do these guys not worry about the future?

Where we live, the bare hook swung by a while ago.

And not just through the fishery.

People adjusted.

They take a short view on things here now.

There are disadvantages to that.

And some advantages.

The guilt lingers though.

Maybe it's our lot to be the ones who feel that guilt.

Sunday, February 08, 2009

Mid-February mid-Atlantic weather advisory

Sometimes I love to post blog entries with titles that will mess up or just get in the way of serious Google searches undertaken by serious people looking for serious information.

And so with this one.

Please be advised this posting will mostly be about vitamins. Not maritime conditions.

So eventually the weather systems aligned. What I mean is, the weather systems that are pounding Atlantic Canada eased off slightly and the weather systems pounding Ireland and the UK ramped up slightly and so there was almost a condition alignment. It brought about some interesting consequences.

The Queen Parents started to get quite panicky about the idea of me driving to Cape Breton by myself, until I pointed out that the snow is scraped/ pushed/ ploughed off the roads here, so it is safer than at home.

Certain random people sent me emails that said 'yeah, okay I understand now'.

I got to see photos of people I know to be grown ups making snowmen when they should have been at work.

I would just like to point out that people don't make snowmen in Canada as a rule. They're too busy getting on with the day. Tobogganing now or skiing is considered acceptable snow fun.

In fact, there's such an absence of snowmen in politically correct Canada, I am beginning to think snowmen is one of those Enid Blyton things along with all those bad, unmentionable things she seems to have encouraged many generations, including mine, to do in her seemingly innocent children's writing.

Maybe we'll all wake up one morning sometime soon and realise that to build a snowman is a really bad thing.

Anyways, back to the weather.

Now that you have the same weather as us, here's some advice.

Take plenty of Vitamin D. At least 1,000mgs a day. This week in Canada, it was announced that they're pretty sure that there's a positive link between Vitamin D deficiency and multiple sclerosis. So take it for that reason too.

Go on. Vitamin D is really cheap. It's sunshine in a bottle.

If the wind is cutting your face, and you live near the sea where there's lots of salt, or near the airport, where there's lots of salt right now, you're going to have dry skin by the end of March. Then one day in April the sun will shine very brightly and you will look in a mirror and go 'ohmygod deh wrinkels!!'

Don't panic!!! Go get some Vitamin E capsules, and take them if you feel like it. But about once a week, cut a capsule open and gently pat the goo onto the skin around your eyes. Let it dry in. Don't do this unless you have an hour to spare to just sit around and do this, as the goo is very very sticky. Do not under any circumstances go for a walk on the beach.

INSTANT WRINKLE REMOVER, EH! EH! EH! FOR LIKE NO MONEY AT ALL!!

See, the Queenie knows how to look after you all.

Those tissues with the goo in them to make your nose feel nice when you have a cold are really great for getting snow/ salt/ sand/ all the winter crap off your shoes/ boots.

WEAR A HAT!!!!

Look after your hair.

It is very important to use the right shampoo and conditioner in the winter because the snow/ ice ruins your hair and the continuous hat wearing gives you a bad case of hat head.

I have tried them all. Organic, non-organic, every supermarket brand, every stylist brand, Aveda, all of them.

The absolute best shampoo - conditioner combo for the winter hair that comes with wind, rain and snow is Head and Shoulders shampoo followed by Pantene conditioner for coloured hair.

So there you go.

Just think... for you guys, this is an exciting period that will end soon with snowdrops and tulips and daffodils. For us, this is what it's going to be like until April.

April is when the snow melts into the rivers, the birds come back, the fishing season begins, the hardy among us get out the camping gear.

And the black fly wake up.

Thursday, February 05, 2009

MonoMeme to while away some time

I got this from Jersey Girl. You have to provide a one word response to each prompt. It is more difficult than it looks:

1. Where is your cell phone? bag
2. Your significant other? home
3. Your hair? limp
4. Your favorite thing? campfires
5. Your dream last night? unmemorable
6. Your favorite drink? juice
7. Your dream/goal? independence
8. What room you are in? 117
9. Your hobby? snapshotting
10. Your fear? poverty
11. Where do you want to be in 6 years? home
12. Where were you last night? sofa
13. Muffins? usually
14. Wish list item? iPod
15. Where you grew up? Birr
16. Last thing you did? Peed
17. What are you wearing? sweats
18. Your TV? convex
19. Your pets? murdered
20. Friends? scattered
21. Your life? stabilised
22. Your mood? grumpy
23. Missing someone? usually
24. Car? Icy
25. Something you're not wearing? shoes
26. Your favorite store? Biscuit
27. Your favorite color? Biscuit
28. When is the last time you laughed? yesterday
29. Last time you cried? Tuesday
30. Who will resend this? irrelevant
31. One place that I go to over and over? beach
32. One person who emails me regularly? mum
33. Favorite place to eat? Chives
34. Why you participated in this survey? whiling
35. What are you doing tonight? whiling

The View from the EconoLodge

So I'm in the EconoLodge in Port Hawkesbury, whiling away a February evening.

A February evening in Inverness County, Cape Breton is a pretty bleak affair to while.

Snow everywhere. Not much else. If things are not shut down due to arrival of the global meltdown, they're closed until the spring melt arrives.

The car is parked at a jaunty angle outside my motel room door, because I got the room at the corner where the snow drifts.

The room is cold, no matter how much I crank the heat.

The bathroom is not conducive to bathing.

I'm not seeing any extra blankets.

The whole thing is a little Bates Motel for me.

I drove up through the mainland of the province in the damp cold afternoon grey of a Nova Scotia day after the day after a twenty hour snow and ice storm. The roads were finally clear, but the landscape is starkly white on black. The only depth in the view is the chiaroscuro of the sky.

Up over Mount Thom, that depth flattens to a couple of feet in front of the car.

I do my usual thing and don't want to stop for fuel because it's too cold. Then I drive twenty kilometres on fumes searching for an exit with a gas station.

I stop at the Dragonfly in Antigonish for a latte and some chocolate cake. The break was warming inside and out, but it meant I drove the last fifty kms in the dark, spitting snow, facing the glare of the oncoming lights.

Driving up to Cape Breton on a snowy Thursday in February puts me in the kind of grumpy mood it takes me days to get out of.

Hopefully, the sunshine forecast for tommorrow will make the drive home bearable and I will be home by seven at the latest.

I still don't know what to blog about... February numbs my brain.

Maybe tomorrow.