This week's Friday is Saturday

I had the day off work today.  It is a great scheme that the provincial government has.  Basically, if you work an extra half hour every day, you get every third Friday off.

Talk about golden handcuffs.  Very difficult to leave a place like that.

Even if  being headhunted by a major corporation is a pleasure-suffused experience.

So I had today off and slept in till 9.30, which was not good because we had a date at the puppy resort.

I found one that had dates, not interviews.  Which was also cheaper.

So threw some clothes on, put the coffee in the travel mug and off we went.

Dumped the dog off.

They said I could call and check up on her as often as I wanted to.

wow.  I mean, I know I'm sad and all, but it would never occur to me to check up on her when she's in a place where someone else is being paid to put up with her.

Off I went to get my hair done.

Graham shrieked at my split ends.

I hadn't noticed I had any.

WHAT have you been doing to your hair?  Have you been using a straightener?

Again, I was a bit bemused at all the fuss over nothing, but it was nice to have them oiled and rubbed and cut and shaped and then he put me under the dryer for a few minutes (because I have SO MUCH HAIR) and I nearly fell asleep such was the pleasantness of the hot air on my sore neck (from Pilates).

If I had a kid today would have been yummy muymmy day.

Graham and his partner are adopting two kids.  One is 24 months and the other is 18 months.

I asked him was he insane.

No.  He's just a really really nice person, I guess.  He made me feel a bit selfish, what with not wanting to adopt any unwanted kids who will end up in care if I don't.

Ah well, selfish is as selfish does, I guess.

Then I went to the Home Depot and did the birthday shopping for Himself.

Power Tool section.

Of course.

I hadn't realised there was a power tool made that he didn't own, but apparently there was.

Then I went to the major store that I'm not supposed to shop in, but I do because it's cheap and I don't have a local electronics store to support (because they all closed down due to the intense competition from said mega-store!), and finally finally bought the external drive I promised Yandry the Cuban barman last November.

Now, just to get it there...

Also I bought a new phone, that is guaranteed not to cut out when the Internet is being surfed, like our current 24Ghz piece of crap.

And a new alarm clock, because I am tired of trying to sleep in a room that is bathed in eerie green glow all night.

And then I went to the bookshop I'm not supposed to shop in either, because it kills the smaller guy, and bought four books in the 80% off section...

Selfish selfish selfish...

I'm not sure what else I'm supposed to do though - I got four books for the price of one.  That's three weeks reading.  I was down to Bill Clinton's My Life... yawn...

Then I went to an independent food store and bought lunch.  To make up for all the other sins.

Then I went back to the puppy resort and picked up my girl.

The puppy resort technicians were in tears when we left.

My computer just posted my post while I was still typing... new keyboard... I keep doing stuff I don't mean to. 

Anyways, either they are the best goddamn marketers I ever met, or the dog is one of those 'street angel, house devil' types.

Oooh, she's so gentle with the other dogs, and she's soooo pretty, and she's such a gooood girl...'

Whatever.

She's a pain in the ass most of the time.

Anyway, she's been asleep since we got back, so puppy resort is definitely ON!

Now I'll post until I think of something interesting to write about.

The thing I love about Friday being the Saturday, is that Saturday can be whatever you want it to be.

Sunday will just be Sunday.

Numb-assedness requires short post

I did promise myself at least three posts while Himself was away. I reckoned without the lure of True Blood Series 2, which I couldn't possibly watch while he's here.

It's not The Wire, or Dexter or Hung, so why would I watch it?

Why indeed, dear, certainly not because of Eric the Vampire.

At all, at all.

However, I managed two, and tonight I have a numb ass because I got a gignormous injection in my right buttock this afternoon and the pain has made everything between my hip bone and my knee numb.

So sitting down is a challenge.

Which of course was good for Shannon, who is currently lying on the wet deck in the moonlight absolutely POOPED.

Due to all the FUN ACTIVITIES we had because Queenie needed to stretch her legs.

And Series 2 is over.

So despite that, this will have to be short, and then I will get back to Bored to Death, which showing on HBO Canada at the moment and is fun in a silly way, not least because Ted Danson plays an old lech in it.

A Mr. Big for Real Women who like to have fun. Not silly women like Carrie. Who wouldn't know fun if it bit them in the numb buttock.

Also, I now want to go to Brooklyn on my holidays.

Anyways, I have been home alone for a week now, Himself having gone to NB to work. And there's no point in posting about work, even if I would, so it'll have to be a post about the dog.

I know, I'm sorry.

Although, I must say I find her endlessly interesting.

Things I find interesting and amusing about my dog

1. We have a game called the saucepan game, where I chase her round the house banging a saucepan lid against the bottom of the saucepan. We have an open plan-ish type place, with no doors downstairs, so it's round and round and round the stairwell through three room until one of us collapses. (tonight I win, for a change)

Although there is a lot of ridiculous running around, the real object of the game is for one of us to sneak up on the other one and FRIGHTEN THE BEJAYSUS OUT OF HER! The interesting thing is that she's so good at it, I actually enjoy the game. There's lots of sidling up along the sitting room wall without breathing and trying to figure out where the other player is. Or hiding in the washroom. Or nipping up the stairs and jumping down at just the right moment. Or changing direction without making a sound (which she's really good at).

Tonight she hid under the dining room table and it took me five minutes to find her. Totally silent.

The other interesting thing is that for such a rough game, she has never broken anything, despite her route through the sitting room being under the coffee table and under the tv table.

2. Tonight she opened the coat closet, which has a round knob, tugged down my smelly old blue camping sleeveless jacket which she just loves because she spent so much time wrapped in it as a puppy, spread it on the ground, put all her bedtime toys on it and scratched the kitchen door until I went in and took a photo of it (see above).

Unfortunately, I will never be able to guilt trip her into putting all the stuff away.

3. She sniffs exactly the same bushes/ plants/ rocks/ bins/ trees every night on our poop walk.

How does she remember?

How do I know this?

4. Although she makes a good show when I get home at night, I know that she will be as excited to see the oilman when he delivers oil tomorrow. She's remarkably self-contained for a being that's dependent on me for pretty much everything. I am never quite sure if she gives a shit about me. Those eyes of hers are freaky too. Bizarrely, the blue one is the softer, more expressive of the two, and the brown one is the one that you can't see jack in.

When she needs fun, it's all 'me me me, talk to me, no get off the phone, me me me', but when I need some canine company it's 'so long sucker.... gotta go kill millers on the deck'.

5. I have never seen a dog spend so long chasing moths around a deck. The bluejays come and pick at her food all day every day and she just ignores them. But come nightfall, there isn't a miller safe on this property.

6. She hasn't peed in the house since Himself went away. Which proves my theory that it was his way of dealing with it that was the problem.

Haaaaaaaaaaaaaa.... I win this dog argument.... Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.

Of course he will say that his way dealt with the problem JUST BEFORE he left, and I am merely reaping the benefits.

In reality, now that she has my undivided, her routine is rock solid and probably she can relax and not worry about it. So we're both ini the wrong.

7. I was playing God Speed You Black Emperor very loudly tonight and she stretched up onto the countertop and turned the volume down on the stereo.

Coincidence?

Surely!!

I won't have a dog that doesn't like GSYBE.

8. She has figured out that if she doesn't poop on the post-dinner poop stroll, she gets another one later.

Go figure.

9. She has figured out exactly the distance between us that she needs to maintain when she's off-leash. Any more and I get anxious and start trying to trick her back onto her leash. Any less and I can catch her and put her on her leash.

We have an uneasy truce right now. Trying to get her off the highway was a nightmare, but she hasn't run out there since. Ideally, I would like her to be one of those dogs who trots ahead a little, but will come back.

We have 'trot ahead a little' down pat.

Babysteps.

10. She has wormed her way so completely into my heart now that when I think of vacation all I can think of is her in some awful kennel having a miserable time.

Which is horseshit of course because she's going to puppy heaven.

Never mind, Himself will be home on Thursday and the house dynamic will be back to normal.

If there's one drop of pee..... he's cleaning it.