|Smart ass anti-baby comedy sketches inc.|
What really sucked about my day (and it was a sucky day) was that my friends got turned down for adoption after YEARS of filling out stupid forms and undergoing stupid tests.
None of us could believe it.
Himself couldn't believe it. And he doesn't even know them.
When you think of all the babies in the world that are hurtin' and starvin' and lonely and scared and your friends want to raise one, and there's some asshole somewhere says they can't.... that sucks, man.
Me, I had spent an hour or so last night looking at footage of George Carlin and Bill Hicks on YouTube, including their 'why would you bring a child into the world' sketches (see the link under the picture), which always make me laugh because it's exactly how I feel about the whole children business. But last night, while I was watching the video I happened to think of those same friends and how determined they were to have a child despite all the hurdles. And I felt a little surge of happiness because finally it seemed they were on the back straight to their dream.
And then they get SHAFTED by some bureaucrat today.
This is a trip down the rabbit hole on so many levels.
On the first level, there is the macro argument. There are millions of children in the world who need love and parenting. There are people who want to parent. It should be possible to match them up.
Except it seems to be nigh on impossible, such are the levels of perfection that prospective adopters must reach. Not just in Ireland. I have friends here in Canada jumping through similar hoops. But at least you can be a bit eccentric and still have a chance.
In Ireland, you have to be perfect. Heterosexual. Married. Conformist. Boring.
But that is necessary, they say, in order for children to be safe. We must make sure that the people in charge of them are not psychopathic or perverted or dangerous to the child in any way.
....yes, old schtick... it's because of that that the rules are so strict now.
Hmm. Tell that to the Nigerian children who are accused of witchcraft and abandoned by their communities, usually on the authority of the caring US and Canadian Pentacostal missionaries working in those villages. I don't see the combined adoption personnel of the world working themselves up into a frenzy of tongues about that issue.
Yes I know hard cases make bad law. I don't friggin care.
But let's pull the lens in a bit.
Ireland's Health Service Executive. Responsible for adoption procedures and for looking after children in care.
Here's a snippet I found on the Internet:
So how do we fix this?
Do we prejudge everyone?
Or do we take a benchmark of real parents and apply those standards to prospective ones?
I don't know. Any argument on this will be battered with the child protection argument.
I just don't understand how an organization that doesn't even know how many kids died in its care can even begin to use that one.
Maybe we should start with the word compassion. In all its imperfections.
Compassion for bad parents.
Compassion for non-parents.
Compassion for would-be parents.
Compassion for parents that are a little different to us in whatever way.
Compassion for non-parents that are wildly different in every way.
Compassion for fantastic parents having a bad day.
Compassion for children who need parents.